What a fucking waste of an outfit
wanna go halves on a baby?
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I just googled if crying burns calories
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Im part way to drunk.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
