I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
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Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
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He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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