Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
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