I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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