The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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