Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
