im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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