I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
