I think my vagina is haunted
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
