That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize