Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
