i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
