is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize