We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize
