found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize