Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
