I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
