He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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