Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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