you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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