It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize