Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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