Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
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