I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.