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• (310): View more from California

  i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex

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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I wonder if you can snort coke upside down

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..

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• (516): View more from New York

  Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself

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