i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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