He is an equal opportunity slut.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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