I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
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