i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
