she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
What drink are we having for lunch?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
