Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(937): View more from Ohio

I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.

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(937): I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird. http://tfl.nu/7edr

Replies (66) Good night (757) Bad night (5169)
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(206): View more from Washington

puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds

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(206): puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds http://tfl.nu/vlbj

Replies (36) Good night (874) Bad night (4364)
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(313): View more from Michigan

I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot

(313): View more from Michigan

He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all

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(313): I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot (313): He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all http://tfl.nu/6st3

Replies (23) Good night (7720) Bad night (888)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!

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(832): How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?! http://tfl.nu/iqkb

Replies (59) Good night (1916) Bad night (5235)
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(503): View more from Oregon

I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.

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(503): I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan. http://tfl.nu/4npq

Replies (12) Good night (3342) Bad night (1862)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.

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(508): she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms. http://tfl.nu/mjwo

Replies (6) Good night (1029) Bad night (1945)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.

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(701): He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success. http://tfl.nu/xbmk

Replies (12) Good night (4558) Bad night (695)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm

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(203): Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm http://tfl.nu/zhmu

Replies (9) Good night (961) Bad night (1722)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?

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(609): LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER? http://tfl.nu/1zq3

Replies (7) Good night (1111) Bad night (613)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

How was the birthday sex?

(1-610): View more from Pennsylvania

Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.

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(610): How was the birthday sex? (1-610): Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs. http://tfl.nu/8fjx

Replies (2) Good night (536) Bad night (2116)
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(387): View more from

The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?

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(387): The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them? http://tfl.nu/qjyv

Replies (11) Good night (1436) Bad night (371)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.

(1-919): View more from North Carolina

JESUS

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(919): you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered. (1-919): JESUS http://tfl.nu/td1m

Replies (3) Good night (991) Bad night (269)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......

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(860): btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd....... http://tfl.nu/m4om

Replies (4) Good night (237) Bad night (657)
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(206): View more from Washington

There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.

(1-206): View more from Washington

First world problems.

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(206): There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight. (1-206): First world problems. http://tfl.nu/pvak

Replies (2) Good night (552) Bad night (277)
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(302): View more from Delaware

apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.

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(302): apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask. http://tfl.nu/f2ag

Replies (3) Good night (831) Bad night (197)

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