Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
