I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
