If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
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