I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
