remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
