Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize