yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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