We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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