bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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