I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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