So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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