i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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