Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
