i think my mom watched the whole time
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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