if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
