so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
