i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
