the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
