I'm really into asian looking animals
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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