Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize