Pappa wants mamma naked
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
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