you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
